Lorenzo "Myki" Victorino

"Its not the pain that hurts the most, its the look on your face that breaks my heart"

I've been battling with this situation for like 3 months now. this is insane. Every time i remind my self to stop liking him, bumabalik parin pag nag-uusap kami. Kahit na sabihin ko sa sarili ko na ayaw ko na, hindi umeepekto. Here's the thing, alam na niya lahat. When? October 11, 2009.

All out and drama night. At mas nahihirapan ako kasi he has something to me din daw. which is bullshit kasi kung hindi ko pa sinabi pano at kelan ko pa malalaman. One more thing, hindi ko alam kung hanggang saan to. hanggang sa pagiging "uy-steady-muna-tayo" days. Ayoko kasing ma-disappoint e, AYOKO NA ma-disappoint.

what are my plans:

First, thankful ako cause dumating sa stage na to! unlike dati hanggang tingin-kilig lang ako. NOW? everything's different. He knows that i like him, I know na he has something to me. ano ba kasi yung something na to. and the catch is, kaka-end lang ng long time relationship niya. which is super afraid ako kasi nasabi niya na gusto na muna niya mag enjoy. these shits are all the same back then when i was with Adi. BUT! Myki's different from him.

Second, I am relying to him, if he wants to make landi to me which is really not my thing, then let's get it on bitches. i already told him that i can be the bitchiest bitch ever. But I CAN'T fucken do that to him. though i admit he has this side of an asshole man in a proper way. c'mon he's a guy. we're like one and the same.

third, everything rides on hope now. isang pitik nalang, mahal ko na siya.

i can't wait to forget you. if i can

Cheddar, MOVE ON. He's not into you. OKAY?

MOVING OUT!

Title palang alam na. YES! it is officially confirmed! I'm finally moving out. Mom and I have been talking about this last week. Hindi ko lang talaga malaman laman kung ano ba talaga yung dapat kong mafeel. it's like MIXED emotions. SOLID. Excited ako sa part ng pagppaint ng walls, pagpili ng furnitures and appliances,. . stuffs like that. sobrang parang naglalaro ka ng Sims, but this time, totohanan na. haha. Malungkot kasi, uhm, of course, after all of these shits, I still love my Dad. It hurts parin kahit konti to be away from him. kahit BULLSHIT na pinaggagawa niya sa family, i still love him. Scared because, iba na yung tumira sa ibang place, you know what i mean? Oo, parang ako ang nag-solo sa house na to since 3rd year, pero this time, iba na e, i'm scared. i don't know kung kaya ko ba talaga. it's like 87% of me is ready and the rest is scared parin. My family agreed nadin of me moving out. teka guys, punta naman tayo sa positive. so this will be (hopefully) the outlook of my apartment! :))

for my bedroom. haha!

lots of black frames!

this one's funny!

clippings! :)

this is something impossible, pero sige try. haha!

Anyway, pinalitan ko na po yung header. like it? coz i do. :D

Best person evurr! :)

"Kanina tinanggap ko nang MAG SCUBA DIVING sa Padre Faura at Un Station. Nagmukha na akong palaboy sa LRT, Paperboat sa Bambang. NGAYON NAMAN TAONG KWEBA NA KO SA BAHAY? Hindi ko malasap ang kasarapan ng kaarawan ko.. Pahinging ilaw"

HAHAHAHAHA! you're the best person ever cho! i love you bestfriend! HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY! We're almost legendary! You and Me are perfect team! haha! :)

HAPPY 19th BIRTHDAY! I LOVE YOU!

When someone breaks your heart, it teaches you that loving someone does not always mean that the person will love you back. But don’t turn your back on love, because when you find the right person, the joy that one person brings you will make up for all of your past hurts. Times a thousand fold.

i have to do this. i won't expect anymore from him. LET'S MOOOOOOVVVEEE forward.

RUNWAY

We have this organization called Likhang Sining, one of the projects of our organization is to have a Fashion Show. well that explains alot. Our Fashion show will be held at MPH on November 27, 2009. yesterday, we had to filter some models, it's not easy to choose ha!, because,

A. I might hurt their feelings B. they maybe have some potential that i do not see that day. it's really hard. one thing i love the most about our event is that Myki joined our fashion show. (lahat naman kasi halos ng players, PERO KAHIT NA!) hahaha! i'm in cloud nine yesterday! I couldn't even notice his flaws while walking! by the help of alcohol, i had the guts to text him last night (as in muntanga yung mga sinasabi ko). gusto ko kasi siya kuhanin as one of my models. i also texted tuliao. i really like tuliao's body features. so yes, i'll take him too.

Earlier this morning, i browsed chictopia for some guidelines to my collection.

on Karla Rafols

LBD with of course a hippie band, cuffs, and gold necklaces. :)

shoes: Dolce Vita cut out heel

on Aya Casado

so instead of that top, i'm gonna go with a White Cami, an Acid wash 5 pocket shortie.

shoes: studded marly heel

on John Tuliao

tik will go topless. hahaha! joke lang.

its either a long sleeve military pullover hoodie or an FZ hoodie, faded grey mineralist tee, straight cut blue steel jeans.

shoes: Vans authentic bamboo sneaker.

on Nico Melencio

white scattered V neck, an Indigo Blazer, Fleur De Lis Belt, vintage cut off shorts, hippie hairband

shoes: Vans Flip Flop

finally on Myki. :)

black fleece moto jacket with hood, white washed flecked crew tee, frickin chino shorts

shoes: cladwell leather plimsoll

i know that Myki makes my day complete. but yes, i've decided to let go and accept everything. Life goes on, let's move forward. :)

PS: matutuwa parin ako if he likes me back. :)) hahaha! asa pa ako. :D

i cried too much last night, my eyes were puffy and it hurts alot. for one thing. i think that i cannot continue liking him anymore cause i feel like he wont like me as well as i like him. you know what i mean? i'm losing hope. until i clicked the What God Wants You to Know application in my facebook account.. and the result was.

On this day of your life, Cheddar, we believe God wants you to know ... that nothing is exciting if you know what the outcome is going to be.
	You keep wanting to know how things will play out, keep asking to see the future. God doesn't give anyone the power to know the future, because life becomes maddeningly boring when you know everything upfront. So, instead of struggling, enjoy the uncertainty - to be alive means to not know.

scary much?

SHUTTER!

here is something that i did awhile ago. :D

CONVERSATION

Friend: Win Some, Lose Some

Me: Puro nga lose some e. :|

Friend: Edi Ibig sabihin malapit na magkaroon ng Win. :)

KEEP ON BOUNCIN'!

Met a couple of new friends! Ate Inna! (the girl at the left side) and Kuya Rj
(who took this photo)

got a nice spot without stubs. my gosh stubs were sold out 30 minutes after town released it. say WTH!! haha! so yea, we have to be there really early.. we waited for like 4 hours.. yes, 4 effin hours! .. met new friends etc. it was worth the wait! i will always love dancing in whatever form!
as i quote Jabba, "KEEP ON BOUNCIN"
love! :)